Empty Me Out

Have you ever felt empty? Have you ever felt dry? Have you ever felt like just going to your living room and laying on the floor with your face down and your hands at your sides? Even if you haven’t felt that way and cannot relate, I’m gonna tell you anyway that that is how I feel. There is no reason for this melancholy. I could blame the weather, month end processes at work, not enough protein, or lack of fellowship, but even if everything in my environment were perfect, would that really change how I feel? After all, I decide how I feel, right? I decide whether I will look positively on life and seize the day or look negatively on life and wish the day would end.

Though I am really grateful for my job and my coworkers are great, yet I felt a tug on my heart today, a tug away from this place and everything that is familiar. I have no idea what is at the end of this string pulling at my heart, but I have a feeling that I will one day have no choice but to follow, and it would hurt more to follow if I have no choice than if I should voluntarily go. Now, I am left with no alternative. I cannot talk up a solution or write some inspiring quote to carry me through. I just need Jesus.

Dear Jesus, take me where You want me to go. Give me wisdom to look and listen for Your leading. Give me courage to follow You in The Way. Help me trust You, no matter the cost of following You. I do not know the way, but I know The Way. Abba, let that be enough. Please, help me in my unbelief. Amen.

Go.

That is such a terrifying word.

For one, it is hard to know what it means outside of its proper context. It is a command that can be given in love, anger, or plain annoyance. And it also implies that something new, uncertain, and/or unplanned lies ahead.

In Matthew 28:19-20a, Jesus said, “Go you therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost; teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you.” That is a rather tall order: teaching all nations and baptizing them. But what nations and what exactly does it sound like and look like to teach a nation? And how am I supposed to do that? Well, I would have nothing but questions if Jesus had stopped there, but He continued to say, “And, lo, I AM with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen.” (20b) So, I may be confused and uncertain, but Jesus is with me. Is it strange that such a thought is of little comfort? What could Jesus do right here and now? The answer precedes the commission; “All power is given unto Me in Heaven and in earth.” (18b)

I serve and follow a God Who has real power in the world today, power to change hearts as well as environments. And more than just changing the world around me, He changes the heart within me, because He abides in me and I in Him. So, why is it that the word, go, still sounds so terrifying? I lack faith. True faith would light a fire down in my soul to go wherever the Lover of my soul calls me to go. A sincere faith and true love for my Savior would urge me to walk in His will, to be where He is, and to glorify Him no matter the cost.

When Jesus said, “Go,” He said it in love and with full knowledge that those He told to go would not know the Way. But He did not leave the called without guidance; He left His Holy Spirit to guide them and breathed His life into Scripture itself. I have no excuses not to believe. I have no excuses not to go.

Dear Jesus, please help me in my unbelief. When I don’t believe that You will provide, remind me of the truth, and of all the times in my past where You did provide. When I am afraid to take a step of faith, please take my hand and draw my face up to look into Your eyes, so that I lose all doubt and fear and simply step toward You. I want to glorify You and I want the world to know the love that I have found. And I do not want to stand alone when the trumpet sounds. I know that I won’t, because I have many brothers and sisters in the faith, but none of my Kingdom family stands there because of my witness. Never have I seen a lost soul commit their life to You through my testimony or the works of these hands. I want to know that my life is not wasted. I want to justify the gift of this life. Salvation is more than just being saved from hell and hiding this hope I have found to myself. The whole world needs You! Please use me. Dear Jesus, please just use me. Amen.

Empty Me Out

by Liz Vice

Empty me out.
Fill me with You.
Lord, there is nothing I can give to You.
I lay down my life
Here at Your feet.
You give me life so completely.

I, I died with You,
Was buried with You
The moment I believed.
I, I rose with You,
Ascended with You
Into the heavenlies.

Lord, it’s not me;
It’s You inside of me.
Jesus, You are all
These eyes can see!

 

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Published by: Sarah Jo

Growing up is a taxing process (sometimes, literally), but I have chosen to grow in Christ and in His grace. He is so faithful to me and I have no room to complain, so I seek to show my gratitude through writing blog posts and songs, and speaking forth my gratitude in front of coworkers, friends, family, and total strangers. I am a little lost, but completely found; a child in the faith, and taking huge steps. I have so much to learn, but the point is that I will get there by the grace of my Abba.

Categories Victorious StrugglesTags, , , , , , , , 1 Comment

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