This Isn’t Home

I did not go to church the Sunday before last.

After getting to my parent’s house at 11:30pm the night before, I was not up for driving another hour to get home. So, I spent another night and all day Sunday at my parent’s. Though I felt refreshed and rested after that time there, I still felt an itch to get back to my home. I have not even lived here for two years, yet I seem to have grown attached. This place is comfortable to me and I gain some type of fulfillment from keeping a home. But I look at what I am contended in and realize that it holds no weight. The stuff I possess and the things I do to preserve or multiply those possessions are worth nothing more than filthy rags. Surely, everything is wasting away and there is nothing I can possibly do to stem the tide of destruction. However, in my own heart, that pattern of destruction has been turned backward by the power and blood of Jesus Christ.

My soul and what is multiplied through the Holy Spirit within me are truly what is invaluable. Nothing on earth can touch the riches I have in Christ Jesus. Even I cannot add to or diminish them, because God freely gives of His riches to all those who call upon His name (Romans 10:12). But how can they call on Him whom they have not believed? How can they believe on Him of whom they have not heard? How can they hear without a preacher? (Romans 10:14) I am young and I am a woman, but none of those things disqualify me from being a preacher.

My God has called me out of darkness and into His light, but my faith and life in the light are nothing but darkness and doubt if I do not preach Christ. His call upon my life was not silent, nor was it peaceful. And those He has called are meant to emulate Him. Therefore, I cannot be silent, nor can I be at peace with all men, because God is too good and too many people hate and/or deny that truth. The world is lost and entirely dead without the hope and light of Christ, and I was in the same boat with them. But this boat that is tossed by wind and waves no longer holds my eternity. My Savior walked on the water and calmed the storm. I walk on the water with Him and I will reach that distant shore someday without the help of a boat, only Jesus’ hand in mine.

Everything I own and everything I do is empty if I don’t give it up to Him… In light of this truth revealed, I want to be changed, where I lay down my comfort, what I want or think I need, and give it over to Jesus, to His direction and discretion. I cannot save myself, but Jesus saw that truth and stepped in. Genuinely and passionately, my Savior loves and cares for me. He even grants me little things like a comfortable home and stuff that fills it, but my true home is Christ, whether I am here on earth or walking Heaven’s shores.

Dear Jesus, make my heart and mind willing to go where you lead and to let go of what I don’t need and what does not ultimately profit me in eternity. Take back this time You have given me and transform my days into a sacrifice of praise to Your name. Jesus, You are my great contentedness, and more than that, You are my joy and rest. I love You more than life. Let Your will be done. Amen.

So Jesus also suffered outside the gate in order to sanctify the people through His own blood. Let us therefore go unto Him outside the camp, bearing the reproach He endured. For here we have no lasting city, but we seek the city that is to come. Through Him then let us offer the sacrifice of praise to God continually, that is, the fruit of our lips giving thanks to His name. But do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God. Hebrews 13:12-16


Published by: Sarah Jo

Growing up is a taxing process (sometimes, literally), but I have chosen to grow in Christ and in His grace. He is so faithful to me and I have no room to complain, so I seek to show my gratitude through writing blog posts and songs, and speaking forth my gratitude in front of coworkers, friends, family, and total strangers. I am a little lost, but completely found; a child in the faith, and taking huge steps. I have so much to learn, but the point is that I will get there by the grace of my Abba.

Categories Awe and Wonder, Blind InsanityTags, , , , , , , , 1 Comment

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